Love and Hate

from Invisible Tattoos by Farida Momtaz

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  • ‘The poems in this collection are an illustration of the hidden tattoos that have been etched along my skin and into my soul. Although invisible to others, they are a mesh of mental and emotional moments and memories. They are a testament of my survival, and more importantly a reflection of my growth. They are my silent voice…’

    Invisible Tattoos is a collection of twelve distinctive poems that depict the beauty and darkness of the human experience through words…

    Described as 'Poetic Stories,' each poem uses clever wordplay, thought provoking lyrics and a story-telling style, to explore a range of subject matters such as social inequality, the challenges of contemporary culture, and the timeless topics of love, heartbreak and inner conflict. The art of poetry is used to discuss history, politics, economy, culture and how this is intertwined with our identity. The poems are all accompanied by an individual analysis which explains the inspiration behind each bitter sweet story of human connection, struggle and spirit.

    Invisible Tattoos is a book that will take you on an emotive roller coaster of highs and lows. Delving into the darker side of life and examining the complex world of emotions and encounters, this book provides a social commentary of the unheard voices of multi-cultural society, while touching on the subjects that make us all human and unlike anything else on this planet. This unique collection of poems will undoubtedly leave an imprint on your mind...
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lyrics

I love you because of the kindness you showed me...
You looked at me, cared for me, cherished me differently...
See no one had ever loved me until I met you
The bond that I grew with you, I knew I would obtain with few...
Each time you touched me, intensity flowed through me
I finally had someone who treasured me for me...

You made me feel beautiful cause you stared at me adoringly when you looked at me...
You became my confidant, my armour; you knew me so well...
You nurtured me, appreciated me, supported me when I hauled you through hell!
And I stood against everyone because I knew this was the real thing!
I would help you become a King!
Remember those dreams?
Together we would win...
We pictured the places that we were gonna to see
You lean over to kiss me and I fall into your being so deep...
It feels so perfect, that I can’t even envision a time before we met!

You call me back when I hang up on you
Watch me while I sleep...
You show me off to the world, and make me laugh when the tears are making it hard for me to breathe...
Fate bought you into my life and I refused to let you leave!
With you I was in bliss; I never knew life could feel as good as this!
You’re my colour, my rainbow, my heart, my everything...
It hasn’t been easy; it’s just really been worth it...

I’m frustrated because you don’t appreciate me!
I’m offended because you have no empathy for me!
I’m angry because you dismiss my feelings!
I’m hurting cause to you I should be more special...

You neglect me, never compliment me!
You’re confining me and I’m losing myself!
I’m actually starting to perceive a future without you!
This perfect picture is fake; the blue skies mask the dark clouds!
I can’t trust you; you keep lying to me and betraying me...
We no longer talk about the future, we barely speak...
I no longer drown in your kiss, we barely kiss...
I’m wondering if this was just a fantasy cause I can’t even envision a time when we were happy!
How can love turn to this?

You don’t answer my phone calls, you wake when I sleep!
You hide me from your people and thousands of secrets from me!
You produce these tears that are making it hard for me to breathe!
What you can’t breathe?
Shit I can’t breathe!
This paranoia is suffocating me!

Your lack of empathy makes me furious!
So I sit there thinking of ways to hurt you cause I really do hate you!
Right now I could seriously wound you!
I have to ask myself what the hell I’m doing with you!
But as I release the poison to damage you, and I can see that I’m finally breaking you; I begin immersing in sorrow cause I really don’t want to hurt you...
I don’t hate you, I love you, and that’s the hardest part...
We’re just going round in circles, but I just don’t wanna give you up!

I convince myself that I hate you; but when you go my heart bleeds...
I convince myself that I don’t need you; but my life without you is impossible to conceive...

I love you so much... please don’t leave me...
I hate you so much... please leave and let me be!

You’re my thunder, my cloud, my heart, my everything...
It hasn’t been easy, cause my heart loves you but my head is telling me to leave before it’s too late...

Is love really supposed to transform to hate?

credits

from Invisible Tattoos, released October 23, 2016
Written by: Farida Momtaz
Performed by: Farida Momtaz
Music by: Feromedia
Audio Engineer: PGM Express
Produced by: Farida Momtaz

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Farida Momtaz UK

Poet/Spoken Word Artist

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